4. Publicly Hate on Sidney Crosby:
People love to hate on those who are better/more talented than us. Jesus was nailed to a cross, Sidney Crosby gets booed in opposing arenas (is that comparison blasphemy??). This is born out of a foundation of backward jealousy, but this isn’t the place to get into it. The point is other fans believe that 98% of us are only around because of Crosby; maybe if you throw around light insults (“he’s not as good as Jonathan Toews”, etc.) you can prove that’s not the case.
Plus, if you secretly cross your fingers when you say it, it obviously doesn’t count and isn’t true so you’re in the clear. This strategy works especially well if combined with a statement confirming that your favorite player is someone objectively terrible and/or uninteresting (think along the lines of Tom Kuhnhackl here).